The Misadventures of "Squishy Mitten"

I really can't quite say how interesting my first week of single life has been. Any attempt to describe it would be understated.

I've heard super-interesting pick up likes and euphemisms, such as "squishy mitten" and other things... They made me laugh profusely.

I really laughed quite a lot this week.

I also realized that my cousin is the best form of sex-control.

I also started wearing my old engagement ring to ward off the weirdos. It actually has come in handy a few times.

During this week, I have learned to appreciate my bed, that body pillows are the best cuddlers (my cat plain out sucks this week... he spent 15 minutes walking circles on my chest this morning). Also that learning new things about people is really quite an interesting process.

So I woke up rubbing against my pillow this morning, thought it was someone's warm leg, but to my pleasant surprise it was a non-sweaty pillow that never woke me up by fondling me, or getting up to go work. I really love this pillow.

I have had a wide array of emotions and feelings this week, from thoroughly dismal to heavily turned on, for no reason. I have learned to laugh loud and deep, it seems like the best equalizer. And to be honest, some situations are hilarious.

A hooker was hitting on everyone at the brewery I work at, including me, my cousin and the guy next to me.
 It was at this moment my ring came in handy. She turned to the guy next to me and said, "Oh, sorry, I didn't know your wife was there!" Ironically, that guy ended up being the guy who left with her...

As the week goes on, everything is becoming a huge joke, I'm not sure how to take things, I'm almost overwhelmed by things, yet relaxed at the same time.

It's really nice to only have to worry about myself during dinner, or when making plans. Much more spontaneous.

Well, I better concentrate on school stuff for tomorrow. Might go to the club tonight. Ah, it's so nice to live impulsively!